They say there’s a first time for everything, and if you’re about to attend your first wine tasting, you’re in for a treat!

But unfamiliar experiences — even those with wine as the focus — can be a little nerve wracking. What do I wear? Who will be there? Will everyone know I’ve never done this before? Will I look stupid?

So let’s break down a wine tasting and talk about what you’ll encounter and what you should do. It’s truly not that complicated, but knowing a few tips and some etiquette can help you feel more at ease and subsequently enjoy yourself more. Which, after all, is the whole point.

First up — what to wear / how to look / etc.

This is an area in which I frequently overthink things; I always like to make a good impression and I rely on clothes to help me do that. But wine tastings aren’t inherently fancy. Even at the most prestigious or expensive of wineries, standard afternoon-on-the-town attire is just fine. Somewhere between “I’m going to the zoo” and “I’m going to a cocktail party.” Of course, if the tasting is part of another function — bridal shower, work event, or maybe an actual cocktail party — dress in a fashion appropriate for that. Of course.

Want to know what’s equally as important as what you’re wearing? What you’re NOT wearing — perfumes, colognes, or heavily scented sprays or lotions. Don’t do it! Because wine tasting is so much about noticing and appreciating aromas, perfumes really get in the way. And even if you aren’t someone who breathes in her wine before sipping, other people are, so be courteous. (Also, you should be smelling your wine.)

How to get there (or, really, how to get back home after)

I can’t overstate the importance of this decision — one that’s best made BEFORE you arrive. Whether you’re joining some friends for a single round of wine tasting or hitting several tasting rooms in wine country, know before you go that you have a safe and reliable means of transportation.

What I’m really saying is make sure you eliminate the possibility of driving drunk. Period, full stop. Designate a DD, get there and back with an Uber/Lyft, hire a care for the day (a popular and easily available option in popular wine regions). When you’re trying new vino and generally having a good time, it can sneak up on you (TRUST ME!), and you don’t want to be left at the end with no safe way home.

What to expect

Most wine tastings follow a predictable course — depending on what’s being offered, you’ll get a sparkling wine first, then white wines, then reds, and any particularly sweet or dessert wines at the end. The reason for this is not to overwhelm your palate with the heaviest or most powerful wines first.

If you’re attending some kind of wine tasting party, you’ll likely get the array of wines offered along with (hopefully) some informative details about the producer(s), grapes, styles, etc. You may or may not have the option of buying wines afterward; it just depends on the type of event.

Some winery tasting rooms will give you a sample of almost anything they have for sale, while others offer different groupings of tastings — maybe all reds, or all from a particular area or in a certain style. Likewise, some tastings are complimentary while others, increasingly so, incur a charge. It’s a good idea to figure this out before you go just to avoid being surprised. Most of the time, the cost of your tasting will be applied to any wine purchase of a certain amount you make while visiting. And you can be guaranteed that the winery tasting rooms will certainly have bottles to buy (and possibly a “frequent buyer’s club” to consider joining).

That being said, you do not have to feel obligated to purchase anything. Treat the person behind the counter with the same respect you’d show a restaurant server, be gracious about the wines whether you like them or not, and in general just be a polite guest. If the wines aren’t your cup of tea, simply make nice, thank the host and be on your way.

A few other things you’ll encounter: a spit bucket or cup. Some people like to swish the wine in their mouth and spit it back out again; most sommeliers or industry people who taste a lot of wine for their jobs MUST do this to avoid getting black-out drunk. Charlie, for instance, spends one day a week tasting wines to feature on the menus at his restaurants. Sometimes he sees 100 wines in a day, and if he swallowed even a sip of each one of those, he’d be unfit to run his business (not to mention that’s actually illegal for him to do while “on duty”). You should be provided a small vessel of some sort to spit into — and be forewarned, it’s likely to be communal, meaning one bucket for the entire group to share. I’m not going to lie, it’s kinda gross; just spit quickly and don’t think about it too much. It’s just wine.

However, if you have appropriate arrangements for a safe ride and you want to swallow what’s in your glass, carry on! That’s completely acceptable too; no spitting necessary. You can and should also pour into the spit bucket the remnants of wine in your glass before moving on to the next taste.

Sometimes tasting rooms will offer little snacks, maybe some breadsticks, pretzels or the like. These help you cleanse your palate between samples with the added benefit of giving you a little something on your stomach, to slow down that alcohol absorption.

Do you tip the person pouring? Well, I’ve never seen it done, but if that person provides excellent service, you can always offer. 

About looking stupid…

This is also something I’ve been known to worry too much about. I hate feeling foolish, right? Don’t worry about it — any tasting room associate worth his or her salt will be thrilled to find someone who doesn’t know much, as long as you just ADMIT IT. Say, “I’m really new to this, I don’t know much about wine, can you please tell me about this?” etc. They will be happy to enlighten you and will probably find you refreshing. I’ve been in many a wine tasting with some blowhard know-it-all who wants to wow the room with how much he (thinks he) knows, and it’s tiresome. Just imagine how the associate who sees that all the time feels.

Above all else (except maybe safety), have fun! Every wine tasting is an opportunity to try wines you might not choose for yourself, without the commitment of buying an entire bottle. It is such a great way to get to know a winery and to discover new go-to’s and favorites. I highly recommend it! Cheers.